I had a dream of you again last night. We were sitting in a little restaurant, sitting side by side, talking about nothing and everything at once. I could smell your sweet, musky scent and feel your skin when your arm brushed against mine. You were there and so was I. It was real, not an illusion. Your mere presence gave me something I hadn’t felt in a while. It was that same feeling I had felt before you were gone. Gone so fast, I didn’t know what, how or when to feel what I did. For just a moment you were back from the dead, so to speak. Back from the corners of my mind and my soul. You were there and so was I. I awoke with hope that you were still next to me in that little restaurant. The hope that I could still smell you, feel you. You were gone. Back to the dead and back to the memory that I keep locked up. I look forward to the next time you find your way back to my dreams but until then I will keep you safely tucked inside the pages of my notebook, when you were there and so was I.

-Christin

Don’t get me wrong I love Christmas, I really do, but with the busiest, biggest holiday of the year comes stressful situations. For almost a decade I worked in retail, so to say for those 9 years that were spent in the throes of crowds, complaining customers and non-stop Christmas music has caused me some angst, is an understatement. Still to this day, when I walk into a Wal-Mart around the holidays, I immediately feel like crawling under a rack and assuming the fetal position.

Another huge task that I find myself burdened with is pulling out my 10+ totes of Christmas. I love decorating but I think I’ve finally overdone it. I ran out of shelving, therefore I think I may have a seasonal case of hoarding, if that’s a thing. It stresses me out not to have enough places for all my “stuff”. Trivial, I know.

That leads me to my cat. The tree never looks the same after that first day up, thanks to her. Late into spring I will be finding ornaments in all corners of the house thanks to my 13 lb ball of fur. I could keep going but I’m sure we all have similar anxieties over the holidays.

Burning cookies, crazy relatives, kids on break to entertain…The list goes on and on. The good news is it will end soon enough. The bad news is it will happen again next year. The better news is you can always grab some coke with a splash of vodka and numb your pain. Happy Hanukkah!

For Christin and I, this past week, the week leading up to Christmas break, has been pretty stressful for us both. Although Christin is the coke to my vodka, we both live very different lives, and with that comes very different highs and lows.

I was trying to narrow down my top 20 least favorite things about Christmas, to 10. Do I talk about how I have not even started my Christmas shopping. I am going to be one of the fools who does last-minute shopping on December 23rd. Bet on it.

Do I talk about how hard it is to be married to someone who works retail during the holiday season? Nah, probably should not go there in my blog. Do I talk about how we are also trying to buy a house during the holiday season. Yeah, clearly I enjoy being challenged.

As I was going through my 26 unread emails, just from today, I came across one from The Parents. “Oh….looks like Dad made a YouTube video. What is he up to now?” I got myself comfortable, opened up the video, and then, I figured it out. My Top Ten Least Favorite Things I Hate About Christmas did not seem to matter that much. There is an important message that got lost along the way….and, I will just let you watch the video and decide for yourself.

~Jennifer

Forgive me if my thoughts are a little scattered but as I write this I’m trying to gather them and make sense of how I’m feeling.

I just dropped my son (11) with his dad. I use the term “dad” very loosely so, keep that in mind as I try to figure this all out. Let me take you back about 13 years ago. “The dad” and I were together just a short time. We lived together for about 6 months and then we both decided it wasn’t working. As my luck would have it, a week later I found out I was pregnant. “The dad” made it to one prenatal appointment. One. I went through my pregnancy ALONE and eventually moved a good distance away. We lost contact for whatever reason and then 2 years later I get a phone call from “the dad” saying he wanted to meet his son for the 2nd time (first time was in the hospital). I agreed but had no expectations, which was a good thing.

The next 9 years, “the dad” would make an appearance every couple years but nothing consistent. I have bent over backwards to encourage and facilitate a relationship for my son’s sake. I have traveled to “the dad”. I have allowed “the dad” to stay at my home, so my son could spend time with him. I don’t tell you this because I want an award but more so to help me stop blaming myself. I did the best I could. I did ALL I could. I did a good job and I did it ALONE.

So now my son is almost 12 and old enough to know about his “dad” but to say they have a relationship is a bit of a stretch. I must add that his dad is not a bad guy, he just doesn’t make his son a priority. So, tonight as I watched the red lights fade away while my son left with his “dad”, I hope for the sake of my son that “ the dad’s “speech about “I’m going to do better and “I’m sorry, I want to be a better dad” is more than just words.

I haven’t spent much time away from either of my kids, so as I sit here at my laptop, I keep looking around, expecting to see him. I will tomorrow but I hope that my son knows that I always tried to be enough. I tried to be his father, provider, encourager, supporter, entertainer, but mostly, I tried my hardest to be a good mother.

Christin

I live in Washington State. It is legal to smoke weed in Washington State if you are 21 years and older. The problem is my 15-year-old son thinks he fits into this category.

First, let me say that I know a few of you will be understandably concerned that I am putting my sons business “out there.” Two things to keep in mind.

1. Only about three of you read this blog. I can just say I am venting to my friends.
2. If he has the balls to come into my house reeking of weed, then he is the one who put his business out there.

Now that my little disclaimer is out-of-the-way, we can move on.

Like most kids, I tried weed when I was a teenager. I was probably 14 years old, sitting on a park bench with two friends who my parents did not want me hanging around with. They had a joint, passed it over to me, and I pretended to know what I was doing. I did not.

Many years later I would try it again. This time I had a “better” teacher. Thirty minutes later, I wanted to eat everything in sight. I decided that was the last thing I needed. Something more to make me eat. As if being an emotional eater was not enough.

I am at a loss what to do. He is 15, doing fairly good in school. I cannot be around him 24 hours a day. I just can’t. Am I suppose to keep him locked up? Am I suppose to hire a PI to follow him around, so I have my “proof” that he is smoking weed? I do not need proof. I have the proof, the proof comes following him home in the cloud of the weed smell that follows him in through the front door. So I ask you, what am I suppose to do?

A part of me feels like I am failing at this whole parenting thing. Where did I go wrong? I come from a good family. Crazy, but good. I had a great childhood, filled with magical memories, 80’s Hairband concerts, maybe a  time or two of skipping school. I always knew I was loved. I know how to be a parent because I had wonderful parents who set a good example. So I ask you again, where did I go wrong?

I do not know how to be a good parent without blaming myself for not being the type of parent my parents were. Sometimes I wonder if I even have it in me to be a good parent….because if I was a good parent, my 15-year-old son would not be smoking weed. Right?!?!

My children are 9, 11, 15 and 23. I have been through all stages of the game. When I had cute little newborn babies, I would tell myself “I cannot wait until they are able to sit up by themselves.” When they sat up by themselves I would tell myself “I cannot wait until they are able to walk” When they were able to walk I would tell myself “I cannot wait until they are able to start kindergarten.” And when they started kindergarten, I would tell myself “Time is going by too fast, it needs to slow down.”

What I have learned in my twenty-three years of being a mom to….

A little boy whose dad left at an early age.

A little boy who never knew his dad, because his “dad” was a POS.

A rambunctious little girl who is my minnie me.

An autistic daughter who is as feisty as can be.

It-never-gets-easier.

There will always be something new to learn. You will never stop worrying, you will never stop teaching, you will never stop blaming yourself, and you will always feel like you could have done more…..and in the case of my 15-year-old, you may learn a little something about weed.

Godspeed.

~Jennifer

 

Jennifer

Let’s be clear. The thought of having anyone over for Christmas dinner that is not my immediate family, is enough to send me over the edge. Now, throw in the fact that I would be having a celebrity over? Nope, I am done. Bring on the vodka!

Do I cook beef, do I cook chicken? Do I even cook at all? Of course I do not cook, unless I want to be splashed all over the tabloids. “Woman Feeds Salmonella Food to Celebrity.”

Upon much thought. I have narrowed it down.

First, I would pick James Dean. I have always been fascinated by him. I would love to have the chance to talk to him over my salmonella infested meal, while listening to Christmas music. Perhaps I could even get him to read “Twas the Night Before Christmas.”

My kids will know who he is. I have a large picture of him hanging in my hallway. There is just something about him that always leaves me wanting to know more.

Secondly, I would invite Donald Trump. He brings on so much controversy that would be a welcomed distraction to my salmonella infested meal. While discussing building a wall, and keeping Muslims out, no one will even notice they are slowing being poisoned by my lack of cooking skills.

I believe as our new President elect, there would be a lot to learn. I like to think I could break him down and get him out of his box. Also, in my fake reality, I envision Trump and Dean having a rather interesting, yet different conversation. I would love to be privy to that. Also, I would love to see Gracie take on Trump. My money is on Gracie.

We would all close out the night with a hot cup of coffee and freshly made zeppoles. (An Italian pastry)

and if we all make it through the night……then that my friends would be a true Christmas miracle.

Christin

This was a hard one. Two celebrities, one living, one not… to come to my Christmas dinner.

Now, I knew I needed someone funny. I not only like to laugh but I thoroughly enjoy people with a sense of humor, which is hard to find these days. So I decided that Ellen DeGeneres would have to be one of my guests. Not only is she freaking hilarious but she does so much for other people. She has paved the way for women and people of all races, genders and the LGBTQ community. A true icon and an amazing person that lives by her words that she signs off on her show everyday “Be Kind to One Another”. We could use more of that and for this, Ellen gets to sit at my table.

Another icon that has stood up for what he believes in a time where he was outnumbered was Martin Luther King Jr. This amazing man stood up for those that didn’t have a voice back when there were separate drinking fountains and African-Americans had to sit on the back of the bus. Back when civil rights activists such as himself were thrown in jail for standing up to discrimination, hate and segregation. I’d like to talk to him about these times but I would also like to thank him. Because of Martin Luther King Jr., we are all able to have freedoms that some of us would not otherwise have.

With these two at my table, we would talk about how far we’ve come as a country and maybe have a few laughs at the current situation we have found ourselves in. Maybe Dr. King would recite his “ I have a dream” speech and Ellen would make us play one of her outlandish crazy games. This would be a night to remember.

Happy Kwanzaa!

Jennifer

Ya know the funny thing is Christin and I plan these writing prompts. We know what the question will be. It’s not like it’s a surprise. Yet here, tonight,  I find myself staring at a blank screen. Not for lack of traditions, I just do not know how to narrow it down. They all fit together, neatly wrapped in a pretty red bow. I cannot talk about going to visit the Real Santa, without talking about Coleman’s Nursery. A magical winter wonderland of animated treasures. I cannot talk about visiting Trainland, a collection of trains that would make their way through make-believe neighbourhoods. In the eyes of a little girl, I would picture myself living in the one of the picturesque towns….and I cannot talk about Trainland without talking about the statue of Jesus on the cross, the hot apple cider, Rudolph leaving half of an eaten carrot behind in our living room and Santa taking all the cookies.

For me, there is no specific one tradition. They are all a collective part of each other. Formed perfectly from the magic of the holiday season…and perhaps Santa himself. I had a wonderful childhood. My parents gave me my roots and now I am able to give my children the seeds to plant for their very own magical memories.

Christin

One of my favorite childhood Christmas traditions involved the family including my grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles and cousins jumping in their cars and driving to an area called Scenic Drive. Scenic Drive was lined with all the large mansions and fancy homes overlooking the Yakima Valley. When I was a kid I referred to this place as the “rich houses”. These houses were straight out of MTV cribs. The “rich people” were obviously rich, therefore they did the best Christmas displays around. It was like entering a real life winter wonderland when you drove down the street. So all the family would line up in a convoy and drive up the hill. Oohing and awwing over the lights while enjoying hot chocolate, huddled in our blankets was such a great memory during my childhood. I have since passed this onto my kids, visiting different light displays each year. Although my house is nowhere near as fancy as those on scenic drive, I enjoy decorating my own house with beautiful Christmas lights each year.

Jennifer

I adore Christmas movies. I have been to known to watch Christmas movies all year-long. “Christmas in July” on the Hallmark channel is my second favorite time of the year. With that in mind, two important things to remember. I am well versed in my Christmas movies, and….it was pretty hard for me to narrow it down to just one, yet after much consideration I did.

So, without further ado. Here are my top 5 reasons why “A Christmas Story” is my all time favorite Christmas movie.

1. The Leg Lamp. I want the Leg Lamp. It is seriously on my bucket list to purchase the full size Leg Lamp, and the crate it comes in.
2. “You’ll shoot your eye out!” I mean need I say more. All Ralphie wants for Christmas is a Red Ryder Air Riffle. However, everyone from his mother, his teacher and a department store Santa tells him no. Reason being…..”You’ll shoot your eye out!”
3. The House. I am in love with their family house. There is just something about it, in an odd way, it just takes me back to my childhood. I love the retro kitchen, I love the decorations, the narrow stairway. I want their house.
4. Tacky Christmas Tree. Splashed with tinsel and colored lights, it just speaks to me. Every year I try to recreate that tree. Problem is, my cats believe the tinsel is just for them, and well, it never ends well.
5. The timing. “A Christmas Story” is on for 24 hours, usually beginning Christmas Day. This year is will begin at 8pm on Christmas Eve. It just seems like a perfect ending to the magic of Christmas……and…..puts me in the mood to start preparing for next year.

Christin

It was hard to narrow down a favorite Christmas movie. Some of the old classics like “It’s a Wonderful Life” or “A Christmas Story” came to mind but I think the one that resonates with me the most is “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”. This funny, light-hearted flick came out when I was about 10 years old. I remember watching it and thinking “well, at least I’m not the only one that has that one crazy relative in the family.” I think we all have a “Cousin Eddie” type family member that doesn’t really mesh with the family. The black sheep if you will. This movie encompasses the madness and mayhem of the holidays including Uncle Lewis who had his toupee’ catch on fire and Catherine who burnt the turkey so bad it deflated upon cutting into it. It really wouldn’t be the holidays without some catastrophic moment.

One that sticks out for me is one year I decided to take the kids out for Christmas breakfast. Well, unfortunately the only place that was open was the China Buffet. So, we got our seats (it was surprisingly busy) and got our food. About halfway through our meal I noticed something crawling on the booth across from us. It was a cockroach! I had 2 choices. 1) Run out screaming and ruin our Christmas brunch or 2) Pray that no bugs were in our food, continue eating and enjoy our Christmas brunch. I chose the latter. But for the record we never went back.

Merry Christmas!

What is YOUR favorite Christmas movie? Tell us in the comments!

What Holiday tradition do you currently celebrate with your family?

Jennifer

A new tradition, yet one that will stay with us, is Holiday Lights. For the past 4-5 years, Joe, the kids and me have been going to Holiday Lights and Wild Waves.

Wild Waves is an amusement park here in Federal Way. It is the only one in Washington State and I am lucky enough to live about eight minutes up the road. I stay as far away from it as I can in the summer. Not only does it have an array of rides, it also has a water park (assuming you did not figure that out from the name “Wild Waves”)

In the month of December, Wild Waves transforms itself from your summer retreat to a magical winter wonderland. Upon entering the park, you have to cross Candy Cane Lane, which is a nice little walk that takes you over a small bridge into the theme park. Candy Cane Lane is filled with, well, candy canes. Each side of the pathway is lit up, and it’s just perfect. That’s how you know, “This is it, this is what we have waited for.”

Although Santa is usually busy preparing for his upcoming trip, he sends some of his elves to the village to entertain the kids where they can enjoy some snow while writing a letter to Santa. After the village, we always head to the merry-go-round. Gracie Sofia, Vinnie and even Joe mount up on a horse, while I try to keep my balance by taking pictures…..for memories.

You can buy yourself a fried Twinkie or Twix bar. Have a steaming hot cup of hot chocolate, or my personal favorite, pick up some homemade fudge at the candy shop.

When we are ready to leave, Joe and I bribe the kids with dinner out. That’s the only way we can get them to agree to leave without throwing a fit. “Noooo. I do not want to goooooo!” Food always wins. About five minutes up the road from the theme parks is a Shari’s. We always stop there afterwards. As soon as you enter through the double doors, the aroma of homemade cakes and greasy burgers takes over your senses. You cannot get any better than that. 

After dinner, we come home and usually watch some sort of Christmas movie together. We take turns picking out a movie, and this year it is my turn. A bit outside of the box, “The Ref.” it’s one of my all time favorite movies with Dennis Leary and Kevin Spacey. I highly recommend it if you have not seen it.

The month of December is so busy. It flies by in a flash. I feel it is important to take a day, to be IN the moment, to create memories. Take a break from all the buying, the cooking, the wrapping, the stressing and be present.

Now…let’s hear about a current holiday tradition that you celebrate with your family!

Christin

My kids are only 18 months apart. This can be a curse or a blessing, most days it’s a disaster. However, since they were small I’ve always bought them matching pajamas to be opened on Christmas Eve. Every year they would gather around and open their neatly, wrapped pajamas and slippers. They would put them on and of course, I would take pictures. A lot of pictures. We’ve kept this tradition up for the last 10 years or so. This happens to be one of my favorite traditions with my kids..until this year. I was kindly informed that I need not buying matching Christmas pajamas for them anymore. My daughter thinks it’s “ridiculous” and my son, well, he thinks it’s “cringy”. Whatever that means. At this point, why am I going to take an hour and nicely wrap and put ribbon on these presents that they 1.)Already know what’s in them 2.)Don’t want to wear them anymore. My days of Christmas Eve pictures of my babies in matching pajamas are over. Guess I’ll just have to dress my cat up and take pictures of her. Feliz Navidad!

Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, and everything in-between!

This is our favorite time of year. Christin and I decided to try to bring the holiday season to our blog. Now, before you get all excited, there will be no give a-ways. We are not one of “those” popular bloggers……yet!

What we will be doing for the next 25 days (and maybe then some) is what we call “Have Yourself a Vodka Calling Christmas”

So pretty much 25 days of CHRISTMAS writing prompts.

It will be fun…..trust me!

Also, it will be more fun if you comment with your own Christmas memory that pertains to our writing prompts……and really, if you made it this far, clearly you have some time to kill, so join in the fun!

December 1st

What is your favorite Christmas song and why?

Jennifer

 

My first memories of Christmas take me back to New York. I was lucky enough to be born in Queens. I also had two sets of grandparents who lived in Manhattan, and a quirky but loveable aunt who remained in Queens. When my family left New York and moved to Maryland, and then Virginia, we would always make the trip back to New York for Christmas. There is nothing more magical than Christmas in New York. Trust me.

The city is lit up in Christmas cheer. I often wondered how the elves not only found time to  make our toys that Santa would be delivering, but also found the time to decorate the city! It was amazing.

Each set of grandparents along with their own traditions gave me memories that I still remember as if it was only yesterday.

One of my favorites.  Lots of shuffling around, to make sure each set of grandparents had the same out of time with my sister and I. The family would be gathered around. Cooking, eating, opening presents, and Christmas music playing in the background. Always Frank Sinatra. As soon as I hear his words “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” I am taken back to those days of Christmas in New York. My eyes get watery,  I am once again sitting in my grandparents apartment, taking it all in. Grandma always keeping a close eye on me. Not because I was a trouble maker, but because I was her favorite. (My siblings do not read my blog, it’s okay for me to say to that.)

The last lines of the song, Franks words, “Have yourself a Merry little Christmas now” were always answered by my family. Usually, they would stop what they were doing, life their glass, while wishing Frank and Merry Christmas as well.

“Merry Christmas Frank! Salute!”

As the years went on, life happened.  Many Christmas’ have passed. The one thing I am pretty certain of, I just know, every time “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” is played, my grandparents, and Ol’ Blue Eyes himself, are up in Heaven and everything stops.

My grandparents are still wishing him a Merry Christmas…..and this time….this time he can join in with them.

Salute!

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

Christin

Christmas is my favorite time of the year. I enjoy decorating the house, putting lights up and watching sappy Christmas movies while bawling my eyes out. And music. Christmas music is the best way to get in the Christmas spirit. As a kid, I always enjoyed the classics like “Rudolph, the Red -Nosed Reindeer” and “Santa Clause Is Coming To Town”. As an adult, it’s hard to narrow down a favorite Christmas song, so I am going to pick two.

I’ll Be Home For Christmas

All I Want For Christmas Is You

 

So there you have it!

Now, tell us about your favorite Christmas song…go ahead…..don’t be shy!