A few days ago I wrote THIS post. I talked about how my cat accidentally tried to kill me, and I now believe I have some weird cat disease because I am all out of whack. Tired, overly sensitive, no energy, just your basic Hot Mess.

Today, I have a new theory.

My day began with Sofia accidentally letting one of cats out. This was the first time Blink had been outside since our move. Clearly he had no idea where to go.

He ended up on the roof of my complex.

That was fun.

Thank goodness Vinnie decided to try to skip school. I was able to put him on “Blink Rescue” while I got the girls to school on time.

(Blink was rescued from the roof safely and securely.)

The girls are now in school.

I have a normal conversation with someone who I talk to daily, nothing out of sorts…and I just about broke down into tears…..for no reason.

Clearly something is going on.

I knew I needed to give myself a little time out.

I left the school, pulled myself together and continued with my errands.

Afterwards, I came home. Our neighbor whom we have not officially met, was sitting on the steps just hanging out enjoying the hot Spring day.

Me ~ “Hi!”

Neighbor ~ “Hey, how are you doing? Enjoying the sun?”

Me ~ “Wow! You have a very distinct voice, have you ever thought of doing voice overs?”

Neighbor ~ (Laughing) “Nah…..I had throat cancer and now my voice is like this.”

KILL-ME-NOW.

The rest of the day was not much better.

And then, it hit me, like a ton of bricks.

I am not pregnant, nor do I have some weird cat disease…..I am on the verge of menopause!!!!!!!!!!!

The signs are there. Moody, emotional, constantly hot, no period, face is breaking out.

This cannot be happening. Despite popular belief, I am way too young for menopause. Seriously, I am!

……

After my day, I made myself a stiff drink and called Christin. I explained to her that I believe I am approaching menopause. I told her all my symptoms. I told her how crazy emotional I am. I told her how I am dripping in sweat and how my face looks like that of a 15-year-old breaking out in acne….or leprosy. I told her I am all over the place, and there is something going on., and the only logical answer is menopause.

Christin ~ “Well, when was your last period?”

Me ~ “About a month ago.”

(Long Pause)

Christin ~ “Jen, I am wondering if this is one of those times where you may be jumping the gun?”

Me ~ “Oh I wish I was jumping the gun. I thought it all out, I mean I was willing to have some weird cat disease, but my wound is healed, so the next logical scenario is menopause!”

(Long Pause)

Christin ~ “Or…….and hear me out on this one……it could just be PMS.”

(Long Pause)

Me ~ “WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THAT?!”

So there you have it. I am not approaching menopause.

I am just having a very bad few days of PMS.

It HAS to be PMS.

We are going with PMS.

Yes, we are.

This is not up for discussion,