The Letter

Another long day at work.

I do not ever think I will get used to coming home to a quiet house. No one to cook dinner for, no husband coming through the front door tired from his long day at work. Even Edward, my black lab, no longer welcomes me with smelly dog kisses. He will just look up at me from his favorite spot on the sofa and then just as quickly go back to sleep.

My youngest son left me a message, I will call him back tomorrow. It’s too late to call him now.

I miss my husband, I miss my kids, I miss how my life once was.

“Edward…you hungry? Ready to eat?”

Nothing.

Who am I kidding, do I really feel like cooking right now? Truth be told all I want to do is take a shower, curl up on the sofa and watch The Notebook. Before my husband passed away, the movie of choice was Braveheart. He hated The Notebook, always said “no guy is like that”. Me, I always hated Braveheart, and now I would give anything to be able to watch it with him again. Since his passing, I have not been able to watch it. I would only watch it as a favour to him, as a “Even though you are gone, I still watch your movies” but, not yet, it’s too soon. I’ll stick w/ The Notebook so I can picture him up in heaven rolling his eyes at me.

The shower felt good, vodka would feel even better. Maybe I have some in the fridge.

My kitchen is clean, too clean. It does not feel like a lived in kitchen. There are no dirty dishes in the sink, no notes on the fridge, no spilled koolaide on the counters. My kitchen is depressing. Perhaps it is time to sell the house. I know the kids want me to keep it, but being that they all live out of state, I could sell the house and they would have no idea.

I decide to skip dinner, instead, I head over to ever familiar spot on my dvd rack. We….I mean I have over 75 dvd’s. A collection my husband and I started a few years ago. The top rack has our favorites, Braveheart, The Notebook, Goodfellas, Legends of the Fall, Transformers, you get the point, and certainly you can tell which movie belongs to who.

I miss my husband.

I’m going to do it, I’m going to watch Braveheart. It’s time. Hesitantly, I take the dvd from the case. Just doing that brings tears to my eyes. I can already feel my husband looking down on me “What?? are you really going to watch it? So all it took was for me to die to get you to watch my movie?”

Laughter and tears, an interesting combination. As I open the dvd a piece of paper falls out. It gracefully makes it’s way under the t.v stand. On my hands and knees I try to reach it, it is just barely out of my reach, and then, just before giving up, I am able to grab it.

No. No. No. No. No. No.

This piece of paper is a letter my husband wrote to me, actually, not just a letter, that does not do it justice. This was the letter where my husband proposed to me.

“Dear Jess,

I know you’re in the other room getting ready for our big night out. I also know that as history has proven, I am going to be here for awhile waiting for you to get ready. I just have one question for you. Would you please do me the honour of becoming my wife? Check yes or no”
and then, on the very bottom, after the little “yes” and “no” box, there was a new note, one that had been written more recent.

“Dear Jess,
If you find this, I just want you to know that I told you so, I told you that eventually you would watch Braveheart on your own. You would come to enjoy it and see it for the classic work of art that it really is, and I love you. I love you in life and I love you in death, and one way or another, I will find a way to show you how much I do love you, now go watch the movie”

Edward comes over to me. He senses what is about to take place. He lays his head on my lap, and I bury my head into his back. I needed this, I had forgotten all about the proposal letter. In fact I had thought I lost it some years back. He knew. My husband knew what I needed and at just the right time. God how I love him. Even in death he is still going to try to one up me, even in death he is letting me know he loves me.

Edward and I must have sat there a good 45 minutes. Me crying and Edward trying to lick my tears away. I got it out, I got it all out. I safely tucked the letter back in the case,then I made my way to the sofa, grabbed my favorite quilt, sat back and truly watched Braveheart for the first time ever.

This was a writing prompt from The Red Dress Club
You or your character find a forgotten letter or card from someone important in your life–whether good or bad. What does it say? How does it affect you or your character? What is done with it?

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5 thoughts on “The Letter

  1. I had to run and read your about page to make sure that this is fiction- phew!

    Love this line -My kitchen is clean, too clean- so image and meaning full.

    Poor Jess, thank goodness for Edward!

  2. “God how I love him. Even in death he is still going to try to one up me, even in death he is letting me know he loves me.”

    I love this, because it's like even though he is gone, he isn't really that far away somehow. I feel like she will be able to move on with her life now-as long as she has Braveheart at her side:)

  3. How many times a newly bereaved person must say “We….I mean I”. You've done a great job of capturing the thoughts and feelings of someone trying to adjust to being only after being 1/2 of 2. Well done!

  4. Seriously, this is fiction right? It truly felt like you were in it. It felt real. Fun and sad and everything in between. Easy to read. Very enjoyable and touching. Fantastic job! Loved it!

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