I have a vision.

Fast forward ahead thirty plus years. I am in my mid to late 60’s, my once long black hair is now a perfect shade of silver. Believe or not I decided to not color my hair, I am embracing the silver. After all these years, my hair is finally all one length. I spent a good portion of my 30’s trying to achieve one length hair, and once I did, there was no going back’ The wrinkles on my face tell a story. A story of happiness, pain, and, well, just life.

Don’t get me wrong though, I am hot. Seriously. I may have silver hair, wrinkles, probably have tried botox a time or two, but I am hot, and when I say hot I do not mean hot flashes, I mean hot, for a woman in her mid to late 60’s. I am confident, I am a free spirit, I spend my days writing and taking pictures. After all these years I am still not any good at taking pictures, but that’s what I like to do, so I’m gonna do it. Because life is too short.

Thanks to the advice (demands) of my parents, I was smart enough to save money in my 30’s for retirement in my 60’s. I am good, life is good. The kids are grown, and now, just like years ago when I went to my parents with problems, wondering how much money I am going to have to save for the therapy of my children, said children are now coming to me with the same concerns. Thank God I am beyond the child raising age. Those were some hellish years.

I imagine at least one of my kids spent some time in jail. My money is on my youngest son. All is well with him now. He is just starting a family of his own, and yet, still ask me for money. I have pretty much trained my grandchildren to under no circumstance call me grandma. I am known as Gina. Oh, my oldest son and I went some rounds on that one, especially since Gina is not even my name, but I don’t care, I am Gina.

I have lead a good life. Not always easy, but good.

Just like most families, sickness has taken a few family members a little too soon. Others are still alive and kicking, even in their 90’s. There has been cancer, addictions, pregnancy,lay offs, but we have survived. I am now the woman who I have always tried to be. Strong, confident, and free. I am happy, happy and thankful for the life I have lead, and for the life that is still before me.

But for now,

For now,

I am a wife and mother of four in my mid 30’s, who probably is a little too addicted to vodka, has no idea what it means to be confident, and living pay check to pay check. I am determined to take care of myself now, so when I do reach my mid to late 60’s I am healthy in body, mind, spirit. I have dreams that are still waiting to be found,I have goals that are have yet to be reached, and I have vodka that has yet to be had.

This is me and my journey. Come along for the ride…but don’t forget the vodka.