Summer Vacation is not for sissies. Mainly those of us who are stay at home moms. For the record, I have been both a stay at home mom, and a working mom. Both are hard. However, it is my opinion, especially that I am in my own 10 days of Summer Vacation, that being a stay at home mom while the children are on summer break is one of the hardest job there is. A job I may add that I do not get paid for…..hugs and kisses do not count. Anyone who says hugs and kisses are payment enough, need to spend a day with my kids.

I do love being able to sleep in. That is a nice change that lasted about two days. Can anyone explain to me why my children feel the need to wake up earlier than they would if they were going to school? It has to be some kind of conspiracy. (At my expense.)

Also, they are constantly hungry. Every time there is “down” time I hear the glorious words “Mom, I am hungry.” Okay really, you just ate ten minutes ago, you are not hungry.

Oh and the “down time.” Now, for the first few days I kept the kids busy. I was all in my “Yes, I am going to be on of those Pinterest moms and keep my children active and creative. They will not sit in front of the t.v all day long.”

Yeah. Screw that. I was able to last two days until the little monsters wore me out. Last week I was actually excited because I found a new park we could go to. Guess what? I was the only one who liked the park. So, we left. We went to another park. Guess what? They did not like that park. They sat on the bench and would not go play. Do you want to know why? Because they were hungry. Of course.

Then I told myself  “Okay Jen, you know what, boredom is good for the kids. They need to learn how to entertain themselves without relying on me.” That lasted about 45 minutes. Granted those 45 were glorious. However it swiftly ended when their form of “entertaining themselves” involved throwing their ball off of our balcony so they could see how far it would go. Do you want to know how far the blasted ball went? All the way to our neighbors car. I know this because of the neighbors car alarm. That was fun to explain.

So then I had one of my not so brilliant ideas. Brownies! Score, right? Brownies are food, we know by now that my children love food. I can also throw a cooking lesson in there. Surely this would keep them busy. Guess what? Brownies only take 10 minutes to make.

I will say tonight was the best night ever. Want to know why? The Disney channel was premiering Teen Beach Movie Two. This is a thing with my kids. They love the first Teen beach Movie, which I have seen more times than Frozen, if you can believe that. All day long all they could talk about was Teen Beach Movie Two. It was a great day. Then, between the hours of 8 and 10, complete silence. other than their burst of laughter from their room as they were watching the movie. That was kinda cute, although it did not last long.

As soon as the movie ended, I am greeted with “Mom, that was the best movie ever, what are we going to do tomorrow?” God help me.

Then, the icing on the cake. My son got attacked by a stray cat. Like seriously attacked. You can see the bite marks on his arm. I am talking puncture wounds. Of course we do not have peroxide. I believe the girl’s used it for some kind of science experiment. My son, being the clever soul he is decided to use mouth wash on his arm “because it has alcohol in it.” Yeah, no it does not. Do you know how I know this? Because it clearly says on the bottle “Alcohol Free.” I did not even have the energy to tell him that he smells like toothpaste for nothing.

Anyone want to take a gander on what my husband suggested he use instead? My vodka!!! Seriously. My husband was washing Vinnies arm in vodka. So, now instead of smelling like toothpaste, he smells like a drunk. Of course.

Oh yes, I forgot to mention. My husband has also been on vacation this week, which is another blog post all in its self.

This is why I drink people, speaking of, I do believe….

Vodka is Calling.